Welcome to the third installment of my Sensational Sell-ebrities Series, dedicated to those who have no idea I exist, but whose star power would reeeeeeeally help me sell some stuff. Last time, the object of my customer fantasies was Mr. George Romero.
Today, I'd like to feature one of my favorite actors of all time. Most people these days know him as Sam Axe on the hit USA Network show "Burn Notice", but this guy has kicked more zombie tail than I can count.
He's none other than Mr. Bruce Campbell!!
Ok....so why Bruce??
1. This guy has been putting zombies back in the grave for years. Ever heard of "Evil Dead", or "Evil Dead 2"? How about "Army of Darkness"? His resume is quite extensive as he's had parts in the Spiderman movies, voice-overs for animations and video games and, of course, his horror films and popular tv show.
2. The man just oozes 'cool.' Only Bruce could deliver the line "Ma'am I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave the store" with such a relaxed, focused tone seconds before blasting a demon into oblivion.
3. Four-eyed fanboys like myself LOVE this guy (isn't it obvious?). They line up for days to see him in person and get his autograph, so imagine the hushed whispers as they noticed the B'hold Designs image plastered to his chest!
SO....(Robert Stack voice)....if YOU know Bruce Campbell, or happen to wash his car, clean his pool, or have ever delivered a pizza to his house....tell him you know where he could get his hands on the ultimate zombie protection gear. Sure, he may tell you that you watch too many movies and then slam the door in your face, but once that door is closed, he'll no doubt light up a cigar, cock his shotgun, go to my website and mumble out a deeply graveled "groovy."
Aim high. Run fast.